Unpopular Opinion: I Miss Being Pregnant

This isn’t something I have shared, maybe ever, because the popular consensus seems to be that Oh my gosh being pregnant is THE WORST.  (See: All the weight gain; all the weird boob stuff; all the peeing ALL the time, etc etc etc). But every once in a while, I feel it. I miss being pregnant.

While I did experience all of those perceived “negative” symptoms during pregnancy, I also felt strong. Grounded. Like the power of the world was literally in my body. And I was simply giddy with anticipation, 24/7, at the thought that soon, there would be a brand new person in the world for me to raise up.

In this world where we all seem to share it all on motherhood (or at least lots of it), you won’t find two women who feel the same on many hot button topics. But I wonder if there are other moms out there who miss that stage of life. Who miss the constant growing. The not-yet-knowing. The excitement of wondering, Who will she be? Will he look like my husband or me? How will she see the world? It’s like the world’s longest–and best–movie trailer.

Weirdly enough, the thought most frequently strikes me when I roll onto my belly at night (I’m a stomach sleeper). That’s when I sometimes feel a little pang. I won’t be back there again.

The truth is, we are barreling full-speed ahead, all of us, through life; but there’s something about parenthood in particular that really presses the accelerator.

Suddenly, you’re not just plodding through your days; you’re sprinting. From doctor’s appointments to school drop-offs to playdates to sleepovers to practices to games to first dances and proms and graduations and then BOOM. Big kids. And then this–the most physically exhausting but emotionally rewarding stage of parenting–is over.

Suddenly, you’re not just plodding through your days; you’re sprinting. From doctor’s appointments to school drop-offs to playdates to sleepovers to practices to games to first dances and proms and graduations and then BOOM. Big kids. And then this–the most physically exhausting but emotionally rewarding stage of parenting–is over.

Parents with older children with whom I’ve spoken about this tell me that we are on the tail end of this “early years exhaustion.” They say, Watch out, because the middle school years are even harder! and I believe them, mostly. Because those years, I know, will be packed with a different type of exhausting behavior–big emotion and conflict, the types of problems that originate outside our bubble. And that’s going to bring its own kind of challenge.

And I think it’s one more reason that I’m grasping onto this stage harder than ever. We have them here, under our roof, in our (very tired) arms. And there’s no way to hold your baby closer than those days when you’re actually carrying her inside you.

So yeah, sometimes I miss being pregnant. Because while those days can be exhausting, they can also be so beautifully simple.

SUN-LOGO-SMALL

Did you enjoy being pregnant? I’d love to hear what your favorite–and least favorite–parts of parenthood.


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